Insecurity is a myth. It’s a lie your mind makes up to trick you into thinking you’re less than what or who you really are.
There is no insecurity.
If that’s hard to accept, then let’s walk through this together. It takes courage to see how to deal with insecurity. I know it’s real to you because you’re the one that’s in the middle of the situation.
I know because I’ve been there before and this is what I did to let go of it…
Since you’re reading this post, there’s a reason why you’re here. You’re in the right place and we can work together to deal with insecurity once and for all.
If you’re a Christian, then let’s see what God says about insecurity:
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.
– Galatians 5:22-25
God doesn’t offer us negative feelings about ourselves. His Spirit is all of the above. Where we struggle is with wanting to know how others feel about us. Wanting others to see the goodness in ourselves.
Wanting to fit in, to be loved, accepted. I struggled with this for years until I learned how to let go. Even now, I still have times when I start to get caught up in what others think about me, but then I hear my authentic voice say that it’s not true and what people see in us is truly a reflection of themselves.
During my teenage years, I was around a lot of other girls that would constantly talk bad about themselves. Even if they were kidding, saying, “I’m so dumb,” they fed themselves with that mantra.
It took me a long time to realize that. I was always sensitive to things people would say and the energies around them. I would kid and say the same things about myself, but I never said that about them.
I noticed that when I said that about myself, I’d always felt bad. Like someone punched me in the gut.
Try this feeling out in your body. See how these thoughts feel to you.
Take a moment and say to yourself, “I’m insecure.”
What feeling is attached to that for you? Where do you notice it in your body?
After you say that to yourself, do you notice another thought that comes up? Is it a positive thought that counteracts what you just said negatively about yourself?
Write it down if you notice one that comes up for you.
Now say that positive thought to yourself. If you didn’t hear another thought combat the negative one, try these,
“I believe in myself,”
or “I can do anything I put my mind to do.”
Where does insecurity come from?
Labels. They’re all around us.
From “fat” to “too skinny” to “dumb” to “smart.” What makes us these things?
Someone’s impression of us.
What does someone’s impression of us mean?
It means that someone notices something about you that either makes you “fat,” “skinny,” “dumb,” “smart” or whatever else.
Does it really matter what other people think?
What matters is how you feel about yourself.
Only you know what you’re capable of. You know your values, your goals, your integrity.
Other people are too caught up in their own stuff. They echo who they are and what they think of themselves when they say something about you, positive or negative.
The people who respond to you positively are usually the ones who are filled with love, positivity in themselves, and enjoy life. They’re confident about themselves and speak nice things to others when they see them trying and doing things that come from the light.
The people who respond to you negatively are usually the ones that are filled with negativity about themselves. Really! Listen to the way they talk about themselves the next time you’re around them. Watch their actions towards others and you’ll see that there are certain people they accept and others they don’t. They’re not filled with grace.
Why would you want to be around them?
There’s also people who give you feedback that’s important for you to hear. Being open to a new way of doing things that resonates with you is important. Usually you already know something isn’t working for you. It’s at that time that some people help you see another way of doing things that helps you and improves you, helping you feel better about yourself.
The thing is that insecurity often comes from a lack of experience. What is one thing you could do that would help you feel more confident with what you feel insecure about?
Write it down.
Here’s one way I dealt with insecurity that will help you as well:
Set up a meditation practice.
Meditation helps you connect with your true nature. A space within yourself that’s light, free from the labels people put on you, free from the past.
It’s in that space that you connect to the present moment.
It’s in that space that you connect with God.
You can also connect with the Spirit that’s within you and with love.
How does this help you with insecurity?
You focus on more positive thoughts and not on the problem. Focusing on lighter, brighter feelings uplift you rather than tear you down.
If you’ve heard the saying that what you focus on, you become, that’s truly what happens.
So why not try it? Journal what happens for you over the next few weeks.
Take a stand. Find the courage to say you’re more than what they say about you.
There are no labels.
There is no insecurity.
Transform yourself. Fill yourself up with love. Loving others comes naturally.
Another Step to Grow In Security and Confidence, Instead of Insecurity
Find out what’s hanging you up with insecurity. If it doesn’t come from labels, where is it coming from?
What’s holding you back from being the real, true you?
It takes courage to “get real” with yourself.
Asking questions will move you closer to solutions in how to deal with insecurity.
What do you choose?
Leave a comment letting me know how you’re dealing with insecurity.